You sound like your from Landaaaan!

1 Very small flat

2 poor excuses for blow up mattresses

3 bottles of wine

4 changes of clothes

and 5 people.

My trip to London.

The first leg of the journey is complete! The train caused far more stress than it should have, and the car journey seemed to go on forever, mainly due to the fact that it was fueled with one coffee and two hours sleep. But now I'm in London, with only the flight to get tomorrow!

We've been going throught the itinery, making sure we've got everything we need, as sensible people should do, and I've started stressing out about the most random things. My passport doesn't look like me. They won't let me on the plane. They won't believe my passport is actually mine...because the picture doesn't actaually look like me! 

"This is me! I promise! My name is Beth Middleton, I was born in Bromley, THIS IS MY PASSPORT!"

"Umm, I'm sorry madame but this is quite obviously not you, you do not have a ridiculous moon face, and the lady in this picture has."

"I was just having a weird day that day, and its a strange angle, and do you mind, I paid £8 for that photo, it wouldn't kill you to be a little more sensitive about it"

"If you do not co-operate we will have to remove you by force, SECURITY!"

"Noooooo, goodbye Australia! Goodbye New Zealand! Goodbye travelling dreeeeeeeeeams!!!"

I'm sure my imagination is running away with me, and I highly doubt they wont let me on the plane, but it's that sort of thing that can steel a girl's peace of mind!

Anyways, I'll right again when I actually hit Australia.

T.T.F.N

And it begins...

PANTEROONIS!!!

Oh deary me. The reality has just hit.

5 days until my last day of work.

10 days until my last day in Bude

12 Days until my last day in the UK

...Tick Tock Tick Tock.

I can't spend much more time with my family! I can't save much more money! I can't even see the carpet in my room! I'm SO NOT READY!

Breath iiiiin, breath oooooooooout. Breath iiiiiiiiiiiiiin, breath ooooooooooooooooooout. 

I need to pull myself together.

It's only at this point though that you begin to see whats important to you. What makes "home" work. And yes, all the obvious things are there, the family, my own bed, saying goodbye to friends, but all the trivial things float to the surface.

I've been stressing about whose going to dye my hair! Yup. I'm going to a different country, I'm not going to see anyone I love for the next few months (except for the boyfriend), I'm leaving all I've ever known behind to travel one of the most amazing countrys in the world ...and I don't know whose going to dye my hair. 

Everyone kept saying "Oooh, this is your chance to really get to grips with who you are as a person". I didn't realise I'd come out so shallow!

Fingers crossed I work out how to do it myself, or Jake has a sudden moment of hairdressy confidence and flair (I think its more likely that Chuck Norris himself turns up out of nowhere and offers to do it, or that I get into some freak accident involving toxic waste that turns my hair permanantly red and supplys me with multiple super human powers, but hey! At least I'm not ruling it out completely!).

I'll let you know if any more personality traits come to light, the first gap year fueled apiphany wasn't as dramatic as I'd have liked, but it's a start.

Keep following. I'd imagine this is where it starts to get interesting, as if/ when I have an emotional break down this blog'l be the first place I turn to rant. 

Aaaand I'm off to panic some more. 

T.T.F.N

A quick shout out to my boy, St Valentine!

Nobody seems very happy about valentines day! I feel a bit sorry for it to be honest. There seems to be three major groups of thought when it comes to views on the 14th of Feb.

Group 1: Full of recently/bitterly single people who seem to think Valentines day is purposefully and shamelessly rubbing the fact that they have no-one to share it with in their face. I mean, a day of the year should be more tactful than that!

Group 2: People who take the day very seriously and like to drool all over it, investing in hundreds of flowers and chocolates. (These are the people who buy those ridiculously over priced cards that sing the song from the titanic when you open them, and those mugs that say things like "My Luuuurve Bug!")

and Group 3: Very synical people who come out with things like "It's just another pointless day of the year where card companies take advantage of people who are stupidally in love or just plain stupid. If you love someone you should show them everyday, there shouldn't have to be a day of the year allocated to it!" (Admitedly theirs a bit of a crossover between group one and group 3. It's just those in group 3 cover up their lack of Valentines with social outrage!)

My view is that yes, the days a bit stupid, but it's all really just a bit of fun. Stop taking it so seriously!

Anyways, in the spirit of St Valentines, I'm going to share one of mine and Jakes more romantic moments,

We're sitting on the sofa, I'm all snuggled in and we're watching TV. It's all very lovely, and after a bit of thinking I come out with,

"Jake, I really really love you" (or something to that effect)

Theres a bit of a pause, and I can hear the thoughtful silence from Jake's end of the sofa. 

He goes to open his mouth, and I know he's about to say something heart flutteringly lovely. I hold my breath...

"I should have gone to Poundland. I could have picked up some toothbrushes."

...I let out the "held breath"

If he had come out with anything else I would have stormed off in a oestrogen fueled rage, and I tried to at least give him the silent treatment, purely out of principle! But it was the most ridiculous thing he could have said. I fail to imagine anything that could sound less romantic than a boyfriend pining over poundland toothbrushes. So in the end I felt slightly rejected, but mostly amused, and so the moment was saved...a little bit. :)

That's the thing about Valentines day, yes you should let someone know you love them every day, but that doesn't mean its romantic! It's the everyday little, ridiculous things that make you love someone. So I say good on Valentines day! For trying to bring the glamourous side of romance into the lives of hundreds of people all around the world!

And if you still feel a deep burning resentment for Valentines day, just make the most of those half price bottles of champagne and have a day to celebrate your friends, family, or just simply you. 

Happy Valentines Day. No, really, I mean it.
T.T.F.N

X

Badges with a V

If your going to understand this story you need to be aware of the following definition, as awkward as it may be for those of my family who belong to the older generations.

Vadge: A slang term for the female genitalia

I'm glad we got that out of the way.

An elderly person, lets call them...Alex, to avoid gender specifications, was chatting to me about this and that, when a puzzled look came across their face.

"What are those" Alex asks, pointing at a row of collectable vases along the top of a mantlepiece.

"Vases" I reply.

"Badges?"

"Nooo, vases!"

"Badges?!"

"VASES!"

"Yes, thats what I said, badges"

I realise at this point that repeating the same thing over and over again at increasing volumes isn't actually getting us anywhere. I rethink my strategy.

"No, Vases, with a V"

"With a V? Vadges?!....I'm afraid I don't know what a Vadge is dear"

"*Giggle*...*splutter*...No, I said, *giggle*..."

"Or for that matter why you would put your Vadges in a row on the mantelpiece"

"HAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

It took me a good 20 minutes for the giggles to subside...and even now I can't help but smile when I think of it. God bless the hard of hearing!

Blogging for Beginners

I have a confession- I'm making this up as I go along.
And I don't think your supposed to do that. 

You write. You don't think about it. And then it's there for the world to see.
Bam!
It's like a journal, except everyone can see whats going through your head.
Be afraid, be VERY afraid.
Oh, I am!

So I've gone and browsed through everybody elses blogs. That's right, I've had a good old nose.
Blogging society appears to consists of over avid fans, people with two many emotions and those who want to share every monotone detail of their lives with, well, everyone (Admitedly they're largely American! (Any Americans please take this in jest (aimed at Bridget and co!)))
I'm hoping my blog falls into none of the above catagories. Please, feel free to say if it does!

So onto the monotone details of my life...
The baby brother, at the tender age of one is learning to speak. He has picked up the words cheese, olives, hat and all other vocab neccessary to see a toddler through life. So, whilst making a cup of tea in the kitchen I hear the phrase,
"Ooooh, ahby! Haaahby!" (which to the expert ear sounds something like "Ooooh, Help me! Help meeeee!")
So, I dutefully follow the noise until I stumble upon the troubled sibling.
He's standing in the landing, snot down to his chin, his 3 year old sisters dress on (back to front) and a bobble hat, balanced awkwardly on the top of his head.
And believe it or not, the reason he was calling "Haaaahby" was because he couldn't get my Dad's Crocs to stay on his feet.

I reflect on this memory a few days on and am left thinking, yup, God Haaahby.
God haaaah us all.

Blog off!

Finally!
It's been a month since I first considered making a blog, nearly two weeks since I started pondering over the title and an hour since I dragged myself off facebook and started tryin to figure this out, but at long last, I'm blogging!
I have to say,
I'm underwhelmed.
At the moment It's ultimately a beige web page with a scattering of birds and a simple (I'll admit snazzy) title.
But it's done!
I'm off to work in an hour (second shift of the day), trying to earn money for the trip and wishing away the new year blues. Plus the little brother is wiiining and wiiiiining and wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiining about getting his laptop back!
I'll probably be writing again ridiculously soon, before the novelty wears off.

T.T.F.N

A couple of days on...
And yes, I've just gone through and altered the spelling of sinse to since, as apparantly my version of the word is not up to blogging standards (as was pointed out by all three friends/family members that I proudly forced to read my first blog). After trying to argue that it was part of creative licence and that "if Shakespear can make up words, why can't I!?" (apparantly you can only start getting things wrong once you've acheived genius status) I've given up, and conformed. So there it is, first blog complete, spell checked and all.